Self Love Abundance Is The Codependency Cure

People find themselves chronically in unhealthy and unbalanced relationships, where they give most of the love, respect, and care; only to receive nothing in return. Despite the pain, they stay in this unhappy and toxic dance, because they are afraid of feeling the intense shame and pathological loneliness that will arise if they leave.

Often this has been called codependency, however a more appropriate name is Self-Love Deficit Disorder or SLDD. On the SLDD pyramid, codependency is a mere symptom of not loving oneself. Codependency is not what needs to be treated, rather the root cause needs to be addressed.

The pyramid demonstrates why someone with SLDD does not respond to traditional psychotherapy, as the problem that is treated is not the actual cause of the disorder. This invisible and treatment-resistant addiction cannot be remedied unless its underlying causes are addressed and solved. In other words, by understanding that SLDD is just a bunch of symptoms of much more complicated and fundamental psychological problems, the problem can never be solved.

self-love codependency ross rosenberg

These pyramids illustrate that codependency is not the primary problem requiring treatment. Codependency is only a symptom of foundational pathological forces responsible for it. In this vein, the pyramid linearly and hierarchically represents the progression of the problem. It begins with attachment trauma and continuing with core shame, pathological loneliness and codependency addiction. And at the top is the symptom known as codependency. The SLDD (Self-Love Deficit Disorder) pyramid gives a 3D illustration of codependency, that is both clinically correct and intuitively accessible.

There is however a cure for Self-Love Deficit Disorder: the achievement of Self-Love Abundance. This is the exact opposite of each of the SLDD pyramid’s levels.

The Codependency Cure™” is the follow-up to Rosenberg’s best-selling Human Magnet Syndrome books.  In this work, he completely re-defines and re-conceptualizes codependency. From the ubiquitous and overly-generalized problem, as a symptom of deeper psychological forces. These forces are childhood attachment trauma, core shame, pathological loneliness, and addiction disorder.

Rosenberg has he re-written what we know about codependency. Also, he has conceived more fitting terminology for it. That is: “Self-Love Deficit Disorder™ – SLDD” for the problem and “Self Love Abundance – SLA” for the solution. 

In addition to his theoretical and explanatory SLDD (codependency) and SLA work, Rosenberg’s “Healing the Trauma Child” psychotherapy methods irrevocably resolves the underlying forces SLDD. Thereby unlocking one’s right to Self-Love Abundance – the Codependency Cure™.


By Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed, LCPC, CADC
PsychotherapistAuthorEducatorExpert Witness

For more information about Ross’s Self-Love Recovery Program and other resources, write us at help@selfloverecovery.com

Ross Rosenberg

Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADC, CSAT, is an international codependency, narcissism, trauma, and sex& love addictions expert who provides psychotherapy, training and consultation services. Ross is a keynote speaker and trainer, presenting in 27 states and 3 countries. He owns Advanced Clinical Trainers and Clinical Care Consultants, an Arlington Heights IL counseling center. He wrote the best-selling book, "The Human Magnet Syndrome: Why We Love People Who Hurt Us." Ross’s YouTube channel contains 75 instructional/educational videos, which have over 2.6 million views and amassed 24,000 subscribers. He has been on ABC Late Night, a ABC "Swiped" documentary, Fox News and WGN News. His work has been featured in the Chicago Tribune & Publishers Weekly and he blogs for The Huffington Post, PsychCentral.com & TheGoodMenProject.com.

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