DROP THE BATON!
From the conclusion of Ross’s new book,
“Human Magnet Syndrome: The Codependent Narcissist Trap”
Published on 1/1/18. ADVANCED ORDER at SelfLoveRecovery.com
We must end the scourge of codependency, if not for ourselves, then for our children and our children’s children. As a husband or wife, sister or brother, friend, or for that matter, as a beloved member of the family of mankind, please consider joining my crusade to join the world-wide fraternity of a self-loving society. I beseech you to let go of your codependency baton, hang up your running cleats, and confidently and gracefully walk away from the “sport.” Remaining active on your family’s relay team will come at too of a high cost. Please trust me on this. I know.
The road to “The Codependency Cure” or to “Self-Love Abundance” is a rocky one, to be sure. Strewn with obstacles over which you will likely trip, it is neither a short nor easy to travel. Expect it to take one to two years to complete. This might seem like a long time, but if you consider the combination of the dysfunctional forces responsible for your Self-Love Deficit Disorder, and the percentage of your life you have already been encumbered by it, you will see how patience and perseverance will get you where you need to be, sooner than you could imagine!
Self-Love Abundance is so good, it’s bound to ruffle some feathers. The bird who learns to fly again, after having its wings clipped, will compel its captor to try to return it to its cage. By resisting your narcissist(s) efforts to force you back inside that cage, you will anger him further. He will consequently double down on his coercive and manipulative methods. Expect an equal ratio between your attempts to escape, and his countermeasures to re-clip your wings. This will be the fight of a lifetime, it will not be easy, and there will be painful consequences. If you follow your gaslit thoughts, you will lose this battle. But if you focus on your new reality, what you see in your un-doctored mirror, you will survive, and prevail.
As each component of your gaslighting-self is dismantled, you will reacquaint yourself with your real self-narratives. New one’s will also develop – those that reflect who you are now, and what you are becoming, not the person in your carefully choregraphed past. What would you say if I told you that you always held all the winning cards in your hand, but never knew it? Now that you are in the know and will never let a narcissist blur your reality again, it is time for you to set your sights on your Self-Love Abundant future.
Once you taste the sweet nectar of self-love, you will gladly dig deep into your wallet and pay what ever is needed, even with it’s hefty price tag. It is ironically fitting to share my pathologically narcissistic father’s advice about this investment: “there is no such thing as a free lunch.” If he were to use this advice for the challenges with Self-Love Deficit Disorder, which he did not, her wold have been spot on! This meal will be pricey, but believe me when I tell you it will be the most delicious one that you have ever tasted!