The Human Magnet Syndrome - Excerpts - page 4

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Adios Emotional Manipulators!
Now is the time to finally rid my work of the ubiquitous emotional manipulator connection and revert
back to its original terminology. In this edition, I have replaced the sugar-coated emotional
manipulator/manipulation designation with the originally intended context: pathological
narcissism/narcissist.
I have broadened my Human Magnet Syndrome and Continuum of Self Theories, while adding nearly 40
percent new content. All of this represents the culmination of the last four years of prolonged thinking
and discoveries on The Human Magnet Syndrome topics. While this book holds substantial value for
both helping professionals and the general reader, the voice throughout will appeal most to readers
who want to know more about the Human Magnet Syndrome and how it might impact their life. It is a
universal phenomenon as it transcends culture, ethnicity, political persuasion, language and many other
real and artificial dividing distinctions. For this reason, I couldn’t be prouder that it has been translated
into Spanish, French, and soon Czech.
This book will help you understand and accept the painful truth about why you have remained loyal to
people who profess their love for you, but who, at the same time, hurt you—over and over again. It will
guide you and hopefully help you recognize why you keep falling prey to the same empty promises that
never come to fruition, and why your
happily ever after
is nothing more than a revolving disappointing
delusion. It will force you to admit the unthinkable: you are as much a victim as you are at fault for your
dysfunctional relationships.
Since knowledge is power and this book will teach you what you need to know, expect to feel
empowered and excited by the material you read. It will become an indispensable resource as you begin
to learn why you keep falling in love with someone who, in the beginning, seems virtually perfect and, in
an instant, becomes your lover, best friend, and confidant—your soulmate. It will equally help you
understand why these
soulmates
predictably take off their masks to reveal their harmful, and sometimes
malignant, narcissistic true selves.
The Human Magnet Syndrome
Since the dawn of civilization, people have been magnetically and irresistibly drawn together into romantic
relationships, not so much by what they see, feel and think, but by more invisible forces. When people with
healthy emotional backgrounds meet, the irresistible
love force
can create a sustainable, reciprocal and
stable relationship. People in this camp can rightfully boast about their remarkable love at first sight
experience and how the spark has endured. However, our stories become quite different when we are
raised by abusive, neglectful or absent parents. For example, when codependents and narcissists meet and
become enveloped in a seductive dreamlike state, their relationship often unfolds into a "seesaw" of love,
pain, hope and disappointment.
For people like me whose parents deprived them of unconditional love during their childhood, especially
the first five to six years of their life, they will likely be drawn to a narcissistic romantic partner by a magnet-
like force from which it will seem impossible to break free. This magnetic force, or what I refer to as the
Human Magnet Syndrome, has the raw power to bring codependents and narcissists together in a perfect
storm of love and dysfunction. The magnetic power of this dysfunctional love will keep these seemingly
opposite lovers together despite their shared misery and eager hopes of changing each other. The dream
of perfect and everlasting love will sadly never come to fruition.
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