The Human Magnet Syndrome - Excerpts - page 26

I lo
The Journey is More Important than the Destination
In writing the Human Magnet Syndrome books, the overriding goal was to provide explanatory and
theoretical information about codependency, pathological narcissism and their dysfunctional
relationship “dance.” Thousands of people have asked me to write about codependency
treatment/recovery, but I have stayed resolute on my mission to answer the very important “why me?”
and “what is this?” questions. My beliefs regarding the importance of explanatory information should
already be quite familiar but it deserves mentioning again: codependents or mental health practitioners
cannot overcome codependency
if they don’t know what it is
. Moreover, if it’s either misunderstood,
mislabeled, or it is confused with another problem, issue, and/or disorder, then the treatment of it will
surely have limited results, or will completely fail.
Now that the books have been written and the questions have been sufficiently answered, it is time to
deliver on a promise that I have made— repeatedly— since giving my first training on the subject in
2012. It is now time to answer the “what do I do” questions. But first, if you don’t mind, I will take a
much-needed break from writing. This is not just for my own mental health—which is sorely needed—
but the rest is necessary to organize the vast library of information I have gathered regarding my
methods of treating codependency.
I estimate my next book, which will most likely carry the title,
The Codependency Cure: Recovering from
Self-Love Deficit Disorder,
will be published in 2019. To the people who are asking, “Why so long?” I will
respond with some song lyrics, the first coming from John Lennon’s
Beautiful Boy
“Life is What
Happens to You While You’re Busy Making Other Plans.”
And, if that isn’t descriptive enough, then
please consider these lyrics from Harry Chapin’s
“It's got to be the going not the
getting there that's good.”
John, Harry and others, have taught me the valuable life lessons of paying less attention to my self-
imposed travel schedule and compulsive need to arrive on time; rather more to the journey itself. While
I suspend the scheduled time frame for writing this next important book, and surrender to the process
of creating it, or the journey, I will be tapping into resources that are far greater than what is just in my
head. In short,
you can’t rush a good thing
It Is Coming Soon
Please know that the delay in publishing my next book’s publication does not mean I have not been
working on the material. Nothing could be farther from the truth. I have been developing, writing, and
perfecting it for over 30 years. Consider that I first provided psychotherapy services to a codependency
client in 1988. Twenty-six years later, in 2014, I came full circle and provided educational seminars on
codependency treatment as it relates to my Human Magnet Syndrome work. In addition, I have
compiled 12 seminar videos (ranging from 2 to 6 hours each) focusing on various “Codependency Cure”
related topics, which are available at my Self-Love Recovery Institute
.™ Even still…I need a bit more
time to coalesce my library into a cohesive package for the upcoming book.
The Codependency Cure™ content, like my previous work, was fashioned out of my own codependency
recovery/psychotherapy blood, sweat and tears experiences, the vast contributions of the psychological
and medical sciences, the generous support of co-workers, colleagues and mentors, and the synergy of
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